'BRACING' FOR THE FUTURE

It's been an interesting week at the house...and a boon for several of our local Orthodontists.

Anna went to the Orthodontist Monday and will have braces put on her teeth...but not now...maybe later this year...maybe next year.  She has to have a few of her adult teeth grow in before they'll put them on. But it's gonna happen.

Mason went to a different Orthodontist on Tuesday...and he will have braces go on in mid-August...just before school starts for the fall.  He has an under-bite that they want to fix. He's lucky in that he will only have to wear them for about 6 months...so they think. He might need further work done in the future...when his adult teeth finish coming in...but the one's going on in August will fix the immediate problem.

Owen went to Anna's Orthodontist yesterday...and he will get braces in about 10 days. His will be on for about a year...then they will come off to let some of his baby teeth fall out and adult teeth come in...and then will likely need another set of braces when that happens.

Three grand babies...all needing braces. The Orthodontists must have some car payments due or something.

I was hoping to retire some day but...oh well...retirement is overrated!


Dan

THE FIND

This weekend...Cindy & I drove to Vincennes to check on her mom and to attend the graduation party of great-nephew, Jordan. We also made a quick trip down to the homeland…Owensville…to visit niece Diane and husband Jerry. They are having their 100-year old barn torn down. In the process, they found a tool box that belonged to dad. Diane called me last week or so to tell me they had it and thought I’d want it…and they were right.

Dad was a jack-of-all-trades kind of guy…could do and build...just about anything. Contained in this tool box was dad’s tool-and-die equipment. A small, unexpected finding in the tool box, had us all in awe. We were reminded that Dad, while we lived in Owensville, served as the fire chief for the local fire department. “The Find” in the tool box...was something that dad must have had available from his days back on the deparment...'a fire grenade'. We had never seen, nor even heard, of a fire grenade so I did a little research.

Dad's fire grenade in his tool box

The Red Comet Company began in 1919 in Denver, Colorado. In 1933 the operations moved to Littleton, Colorado.

Red Comet made several kinds of fire extinguishers for homes and offices as well as automobiles. The extinguishers were produced in sizes ranging from 2.5 pounds to 100 pounds. The popular "Fireman's Kit" contained six to eight grenades which were thrown at the base of a fire, allowing fluid to splash over the flames.

Early ones used harmless salt-water. The salt water was important so that the grenade could be advertised as “Non-Freezing”. They came in various colors: Blues, Ambers, Greens and Clear glass. Their styles were ornate, which made them decorative as well as functional. Later, as they became mass produced, they were filled with Carbon tetrachloride (CTC). Carbon-tetrachloride extinguishers were withdrawn in the 1950s because of the chemical's toxicity. (exposure to high concentrations damages the nervous system and internal organs. Additionally, when used on a fire, the heat can convert CTC to phosgene gas, formerly used as a chemical weapon.)

Now…we’ll need to find a way to display it…and keep it safe from exposure should it accidentally be broken (in case it’s one with CTC rather than salt water)…but it is a wonderful find.

It is wonderful too…to have dad’s tool box that he made…and the tools that he worked with. It was good to put ‘hands’ on things…that many years ago…dad had ‘his’ hands on too.

Quite a find.

Dan

FOUND DOG TAGS

My family...sister...niece...wife...all of us...have a smile on our face...and a tug on our heart these last few days.

In a stroke of amazing luck...the family who currently lives a few houses down from our old house in Owensville...found an item that has been lost for over 50 years. Apparently while digging in their garden space within the last week or so...they uncovered a little piece of metal. They cleaned it off...and thankfully...took the time to investigate the information that was on it. After a little research...they contacted my niece Diane...who still lives in the Owensville area...and dropped off the prize at her house.

It was a dog tag...that my brother Dave...who passed away 1 month ago...had made for himself at the Princeton fair some years before we moved from Owensville in 1962.

Dave would have had such a laugh...and would have been so excited...if only it had been found a few months earlier.

Some in our family have even suggested...it's just Dave letting us know he got where he needed to go...and he's doing fine.

Who am I to argue that?


Dan

TURN SIGNALS IN THE NEWS

I believe one of my first articles in this blog of mine…was about one of my pet peeves…turn signals.

A recent article in The Detroit Bureau, by Paul A. Eisenstein, shares information about a study done indicating 2 million accidents occur annually relating to turn signals, or lack of proper use of them.

According to research by the Society of Automotive Engineers (SAE), drivers either neglect to use their signals when changing lanes or fail to turn the signals off 48% of the time, and when making a turn, the failure rate is about 25%. Somehow, according to them, that works out to 2 billion times a day drivers fail to use signals.

Again, somehow, in their calculation, this results in about 2 million roadway collisions annually.

They go on to say, “all drivers have an ongoing duty to use signals just as they have a duty to stop at a stop sign or a red light.”

I couldn't agree more.

Mr. Eisenstein goes on to suggest an alternative to this problem is to create a “smart turn signal”. Such a system could automatically shut off a turn signal when it is left on too long or by detecting when a vehicle has finished changing lanes. This would work much as today’s cars automatically cancel the signal after making a turn at an intersection.

For those who don’t use their signals, the system would work much like a seatbelt reminder. It would be able to sense if drivers routinely ignore their turn signals and start to flash what the study calls a 'friendly reminder'.

Of course...just as people choose to ignore the seatbelt reminder...many would choose to ignore the turn signal reminder too.

But...even if 1 out of a hundred people choose to begin using turn signals...using their numbers from the article...that’s 20,000 less accidents annually.

That’s a start.

Dan

THE SIGN

If you do the things you need to do when you need to do them
                                THEN SOMEDAY
you can do the things you want to do when you want to do them.

I saw this sign recently and it caught my eye.

I think for a lot of us, it's a philosophy that drives us. Isn't this one of the reasons we go to work each day? If we work hard...then someday we'll be able to enjoy the fruits of our labor.

Now that I'm closer to retirement age it helps me on some of those days when I've about had it up to...here.

I look forward...after all these years...to spending some time with Cindy and doing some of those fun things...some traveling...sitting by the ocean...visiting friends and family in far away places...that we haven't done because we've been busy workin'...and busy livin'.

I hope she's as excited about the idea as I am.

Dan

HONOR FLIGHT TO D.C.

A group called the Gold Star Mothers, recently organized a trip called, the Honor Flight. It was an opportunity to fly more than 80 veterans to Washington D.C. The veterans were taken to see the World War II Memorial, the Vietnam Veterans Memorial, the Korean War Memorial, the Lincoln Memorial, the Marine Corps Memorial and lastly to witness the changing of the guard at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier at Arlington National Cemetery. The trip was paid for by private donations and contributions.

With more and more of our veterans reaching the age they can't travel to see these beautiful memorials, it is wonderful that this group is trying to honor those men and women who served in World War II by getting them to see what our country has built in their honor.

As I've mentioned before, Washington D.C. is one of Cindy and my favorite places to visit...and those memorials mentioned above...are some of our favorites as well.

Some years ago, as Cindy’s father approached 80, he desired to see the new WW II Memorial. He served in WW II and wanted to see the new Memorial that had just been completed. It became Cindy’s goal to get him there…and we did. We then proceeded to see the same sights as listed above. Cindy & I had seen them a number of times but it was the first for Cindy’s mom and dad.

Each memorial is quite awe inspiring, but particularly the changing of the guard at Arlington. It will send chills up your spine, and tears down your cheek. It is a beautifully patriotic thing to see.

Cindy & I want to take our children to see these sights at some time. If you haven’t been...you should take the opportunity. You will not be disappointed.

Dan

MY BROTHER...DAVE

It’s been nearly 2 weeks since the passing of my big brother, Dave. People who know me well…know that I am an emotional guy. I can cry at movies…I can cry at TV shows…I can cry at commercials…I cry when reading sad stories…I cry when my wife and daughters cry. I’m not afraid, or ashamed, to let my feelings show. But I’ve cried very little over Dave’s death. I’ve even surprised myself a little bit by that.

I think I haven’t cried a lot…unlike the deaths of other family members…because I have come to grips with Dave’s passing. I have come to grips because I saw…first-hand… how Dave struggled his last few months, weeks and…specifically…days of his life. I watched a struggle that you would not want for a loved one. If passing to the next life was the alternative to staying here and continuing to struggle…then I gladly let him go to the next life. Because of that…I am at peace with Dave’s passing. Oh…don’t get me wrong…I’m very sad that he’s gone. I will miss him very much, and there will be times the tears flow…but I know that he is no longer in pain, and for that…I’m happy.

My mind goes back to when this started…less than 6 months ago.

During the last weekend in October, 2011…Cindy and I traveled to Cincinnati with two of our daughters, their husbands and our 3 grandchildren. It was a weekend getaway for some family fun. While relaxing in our hotel room that first night, I got a text from Dave…“Are you home?” I texted back, ‘No…we’re in Cincinnati. Whats up?” He responded, “Oh nothing, just text me when you get home.” I texted, “Okay…but is it something we need to talk about now?” “No” was the reply.

We remained in Cincinnati for a fun weekend with the kids and grandkids.

Sunday afternoon…after the drive home from Cincinnati was almost over…not 15 minutes from home…Cindy got the text message from Dave this time. “I’m a bad liar…there is something wrong…text me when you get home.” Cindy texted we’d be there in 15 minutes and Dan would be in touch.

I was expecting bad news. I just wasn’t expecting ‘THE’ bad news he was about to tell me.

Dave started by saying he had recently been having some ‘balance’ issues…like he was ‘seasick’. Having been in the Navy for 20 years, Dave would know seasickness if anyone did. Dave also said he had lost his appetite because of the equilibrium problems, and thus he’d lost some weight.

After putting up with this feeling for some time, and it not getting any better, Dave had called his doctor to make an appointment. His doctor ordered a chest x-ray, and the image showed a mass in Dave’s lung that looked suspicious. The doctor ordered more specific tests of Dave’s chest and head and found a mass on his adrenal glands and 4 masses of various sizes in his brain.

After nearly 50 years of cigarette smoking, it wasn’t difficult to figure out the likelihood of Dave’s diagnosis. They would need to do some specific tests to verify their fears…but it was very likely that Dave had lung cancer with spread to his adrenal glands and brain. 

It was lousy news for me to hear…and it was lousy news that Dave was burdened to share with me. We both cried. We cried just like we had done 15 months earlier…when ‘I’ was the caller…to tell Dave that I had been diagnosed with prostate cancer. Dave’s initial response to me then was what I expected him to say.

“Well shit.”

The difference was…they caught my cancer early…and I had an excellent prognosis for recovery. They caught Dave’s cancer late…Stage IV (4)…and his chances for recovery was very poor. In fact…he wasn’t going to recover. He was going to die.

Dave’s initial treatment was to have radiation to his head. This was an attempt to shrink the size of the tumors in his brain. That, in turn, should relieve the pressure causing Dave’s imbalance and seasickness feeling. Once that was done, the plan was to begin chemotherapy to attack the tumors on his adrenal glands and in his lung. The therapy wouldn’t save Dave’s life…it would NOT cure him…but it would hopefully give him some more time. The radiation was done daily over a 3 week time period beginning in mid November and ended just after Thanksgiving.

During that time, I got in contact with our nephew Kim. Dave and Kim had always been close. Dave served as…sorta…Kim’s big brother that he never had. Kim and I too…are close. When I called Kim to tell him I was thinking of flying out to visit with Dave for a few days, Kim said he’d been thinking the same thing. So...in early December…Kim and I met at the Indianapolis airport…and flew to California to spend some time with Dave.

Dave was not well. His hair had fallen out as a result of the radiation. He had some memory loss that made him have to think extra hard to answer our questions and carry on a conversation. And Dave had developed a thrush…an infection in the mouth and throat that required him to take some antibiotics to treat. Dave wasn’t up for much excitement…but Kim and I hadn’t traveled there to be entertained…rather to be of whatever help we could be. We talked when Dave was awake and willing to visit…and we stayed quiet when he needed to rest. We enjoyed a few mornings out to a local restaurant for breakfast…and we found a good burger joint one evening to share big, fat greasy burgers, fries and a milkshake. We laughed some. We shared stories of the past. It was a good visit…that ended with the promise that it wouldn’t be the last one.

The radiation to Dave’s brain…even with the expected side effects…proved successful. The tumors in Dave’s brain shrunk in size. Unfortunately, it would prove to be Dave’s last therapy treatment.

After Dave got his thrush under control, there seemed to be one issue after another that kept anything positive from happening. Dave’s cough became more frequent, which kept him from sleeping well and strengthening his body. A lung fungus was found near his tumor site that baffled the doctors for over a month and was treated with more antibiotics.

With infections seemingly unwilling to leave Dave’s body…the chemo treatments couldn’t get started. Infections must be cleared and the antibiotics out of the body, so the immune system can help us fight the toxicity of the chemo drugs. That time for Dave…never came.

Food continued to lose its appeal, probably due in part to the radiation which likely damaged Dave’s taste buds. Food looked good and smelled good, but when it came time to eat…it lost all of its appeal. Dave tried…but he just couldn’t MAKE himself eat. He ate when he wanted…what he wanted…and all he wanted. But when he was done…he was done.

One day in late March…Cindy got a Facetime call from Dave. Dave had just got an iPad3 and was trying the new feature that allowed him to talk and be seen on his iPad…while Cindy was talking and being seen on her iPhone. Cindy mentioned that I had been talking about coming out to see Dave again and asked him if that was okay. Dave said it sounded good. When I talked to Dave later that night, he said he thought I should come out soon, and to bring Cindy too.

The timing was perfect, as the next week was Spring Break week. We found some flights and Cindy & I flew out on Tuesday and stayed through Friday. Dave wasn’t feeling well, but he tolerated our visit, was glad to see us, and did some sightseeing with us. It was a wonderful time to have Cindy with me. Dave loved Cindy, and she him.

Two weeks later, Dave developed pneumonia and was admitted to the hospital on a Sunday. I flew out Tuesday morning and my sister Jean, and niece Angie, flew out on Wednesday. I had the chance to stay the night in the hospital with Dave Tuesday night. It was exhausting, as he slept very little and needed attention frequently. But it was a wonderful opportunity for me to care for Dave.

During our private time over the next few days, I asked Dave what I could do best for him. “Get me home” was his reply. And that became my goal. I knew in my heart, there wasn’t much time left for Dave. On Friday…we got Dave out of the hospital and to his home. Goal accomplished. On Sunday morning…April 15, 2012…Dave died.

I was sad…that Dave was gone…that I wouldn’t hear that voice…and get those messages from him again. But I was relieved that there was no more pain and no more struggling for Dave. He was peacefully resting…and I gained comfort in that knowledge.

The following Saturday…we held Dave’s funeral...back in his home town…Owensville, Indiana…the town where Dave was born…and raised…where he had his roots…where he was most comfortable…and where he wanted to return for his last days.

I took the opportunity to speak at Dave’s funeral and I shared with those there…of the influence of Dave on my life. I reminisced of how Dave helped me learn how to ride a bike…how he helped me play basketball on the goal nailed to the back of our garage (that goal is still there 50 years later)…how he and I used to throw walnuts down by the ditch near our house…and how we used to listen to music on the old radio in the kitchen, that developed my love for rock ‘n’ roll music the remainder of my life. Dave had an influence that helped me become who I am today.

Dave’s high school class of 1962 will celebrate their 50^th reunion next month. Dave was looking forward to being a part of that celebration with his old friends. I’m comforted in knowing…after speaking to a few of his classmates…that…though he won’t be there in person…he will be there…and be recognized for his contributions…in spirit.

These 6 months have passed by too quickly. There were moments of sadness… moments of laughter…moments of reminiscing…and moments of love. At the end…I had the opportunity…to help my brother…to tell him I loved him…and hear him tell me he loved me. I was able, in a small way, to repay him at the end of his life, for what he had done for me at the start of mine. It was a painfully beautiful time.

Dave is now at peace. And so am I.

Dan