PET PEEVE.....Number 1

You know, I’m pretty sure I know how I’m going to die. Yep, and it’ll be my own fault. The person involved in my death is even going to be kind enough to try to warn me, but I’ll have not paid any attention to their warning. And my death is going to be attributed to one of my pet peeves.

I have several pet peeves, and more will probably be discussed in time, but the one I’m recognizing today, that’s going to contribute to my demise, is the ‘HONK’ that people’s car horn delivers when they use their little remote door lock device on their car keys. The little button that reads ‘LOCK’ and ‘UNLOCK’ on your remote.

I truly understand the reasoning behind that invention and think it’s great. In fact, I use mine 99% of the time when I am “UNLOCKING” my car from a distance. I admit it is very handy. If you have an arm full of things that you would have to, otherwise, sit down to unlock the car, it’s great. Or, if it’s pouring down rain outside, using it allows you to unlock the car as you’re rushing toward it and then you slide quickly in the car out of the rain. Otherwise, you’re standing there getting soaked while you fiddle with your keys and try to find the door lock beneath the cascade of water pouring down on you. So, for uses such as those, I love it, and see the benefits of the ‘UNLOCKING’ feature.

It’s not those times that irk me. It’s when people use the ‘LOCK’ feature to excess. They abuse it…and drive me nuts in the process.

Here’s why.

First, you don’t ‘need’ to use that function to lock your car. As you exit your car, you HAVE to open the door from the inside. Near the handle that you used to open the door, is a button that LOCKS and UNLOCKS the doors. If you simply reach down and push the LOCK function, you can unmistakably here the ‘CLICK’ as the doors lock. Not a “HONK”, a simple ‘CLICK’. If you look closely, you can probably even ‘see’ the locks move into position, locking your doors. Done. Simple as that. No HONK!

But no. That doesn’t seem to do it for way too many people. They have to…HEAR…their car tell them it’s locked, and they seem to want to HEAR it multiple times, making sure everyone in a one block radius hears too. It’s as if they are saying to me, “Can you see how important I am? I just have to push a button in my hand and my car tells me it’s locked. Look, it works when I am 5 feet away. Hey look, it also works at 10 feet, and 20 and when I’m all the way across the parking lot. Aren’t I cool?”

Give me a break you self-absorbed brat. More and more cars have this feature these days. Get over your self-importance. You’re a flippin’ moron who’s driving me nuts because you need to draw attention to yourself.

Maybe I’m just overly sensitive to it. Maybe my undies are in a bunch, I don’t know. But I just cringe when I get out of my car in a parking lot because I know I’m going to hear somebody, ‘HONK HONK’ before I can safely get inside.

Just test it yourself. Next time you’re in a parking lot heading inside the store or school or work, just listen to hear how many “HONKS” you hear before you get in. Do they do it once, or a couple of times for good measure?

So, like I say, it will be my demise. I’m going to be walking through that parking lot and I’m going to hear that annoying “HONK HONK” and I’m intentionally not going to look because I just know it’s that idiot showing off.

But that one time, it’s going to be a guy trying to warn me that he’s about to run me over but I’ll have paid no attention.

Sir or Ma’am…thanks for at least ‘trying’ to help me save my life…I’ve just grown a little cranky in my old age.

And as they lower the lid on my casket, just laugh a little to yourself if you hear a “HONK HONK” as I make sure it’s locked!!

Dan